Friday, August 23, 2013

40 days of dating.

have you heard of 40 days of dating

it's a pretty addictive blog chronicling the dating experience of jessica & tim. both graphic designers living in nyc, they were long-time, good friends before they decided to try an experiment to date each other, & only each other, for 40 days straight. their "about" page says, "the dating life in new york city can grow tiresome & wearing. tim is afraid of commitment, often dating many girls at once, and he's losing sight of what a healthy relationship means. jessica is a hopeless romantic, jumping into relationships too quickly, always looking to find 'the one.'"

the 40 days come with some pretty specific rules:

1. they will see each other every day for 40 days.
2. they will go on at least three dates a week.
3. they will see a couples therapist once a week.
4. they will go on one weekend trip together.
5. they will fill out the daily questionnaire & document everything.
6. they will not see, date, hookup, or have sex with anyone else.

the blog features a post every day of the 40 days with the thoughts, feelings, & reactions of both tim & jessica. it's been really enjoyable to read & is a fascinating look into how guys & girls see & interpret things differently. they will have gotten into an argument & have two completely different viewpoints of what they were fighting about or how they're individually feeling towards the other person & their relationship.

things like health issues, memories of previous relationships, peer pressure, feeling closed-in because they have to see each other every day, mixed signals, & completely opposite dating speeds & problems pepper their relationship. & then also it's like, you really do want them to get together, but even by day 36 you're not sure if they will end up together after the 40 days are over, & even more importantly, they're not sure if they want to end up together. it kind of hits you that this is a real-life thing for them, not some movie where you can feel confident that there will be a happy, picture-perfect ending.

phew. so many feelings. like i said, it's fascinating!

recently (& while this is a few days ago within the 40 days, it was a few months ago in real time - they ran the experiment back in april or something, so it's actually already over!) they met up early sunday morning & tried a fun little thing: they held hands for eight hours straight! as in, they did not let go hands that entire time. they went to the bathroom together, (!) tied shoes holding hands, they couldn't even put one arm in their coat sleeves because that would have meant letting go. they wrote about what a great time they had doing that & even made little videos about it. i watched the video below & just smiled the. entire. time. i couldn't handle the cuteness!:

anyway. go check it all out if you have a sec!

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